Please understand that I haven't had much time to work on this story since February 2003, but I intend to work on it slowly, but surely, over the next several months (or possibly years). Keep in mind that if you are reading this story in this unfinished form, it is subject to change, not just by adding chapters, but by altering the already-present content.

If you have any questions regarding the story or would like to offer constructive criticism, don't hesitate to email me at sindie11@yahoo.com. Thank you!

Chapter One

The silver moon hung in the velvet-black March sky, which was star-studded at its fullest in the middle of the night. The moon's light reflected itself off the thin blanket of snow that covered the earth, echoing the stark beauty of the cascading beams from above. Everything sat still, silent, bleak, but there was something unnerving about the calm; that is to say, unnerving for the lonesome figure who sat perched by a slightly cracked window in a practically deserted-looking apartment building some hundred feet from the asphault road, which was marked with a sign that read "Adams St." From the outside, it would be difficult for an onlooker trying to peer through the frosted glass to see the pain that was etched across her face, but deeper still, was a mixture of feelings waiting to be sorted out, leaving this poor soul of a young woman lost in her thoughts.

Bringing a hand to the window, she gently stroked the pane mindlessly, not wanting to look beyond what lay outside the window. The frost covering the glass was thick, and the cold air leaked into the room from around the edges of the aged window, but she didn't care. Why should she care, after all, about a slight chill when what was really ripping out her heart was chilling her to the bones, knocking out all her senses? That was quite unnerving. She turned her eyes away from the window, and tired eyes looking down at the floor, she watched her feet move in worn out, slow steps as she trudged across the chilly room to her bed. Pulling a thread-bare blanket over her shivering body, she knew it would never bring her the comfort she needed. And, she thought aimlessly, I forgot to pay the heating bill for this month.

Her thoughts leaving her with little peace of mind, they insisted on penetrating further into her mind as she lay in bed that night. It had quickly grown rather late, the clock on her night table registering that it was now a quarter past three. She felt a chill run up her spine as she stared aimlessly out the frosted window, finding it difficult to draw her attention away from it, so she pulled the blanket further up, until it was right below her chin. This night was one of many where she lay there, fully awake and utterly unable to sleep, for whenever she dare slumber, her mind plagued her with horrific nightmares, visions that made her want to forget him all the more. He was a man who needed help, and a lot of it at that, or so she had convinced herself, but a part of her still longed to be with him, even now... Oh, but that was absurd! She couldn't think clearly anymore, let alone hope to find some small bit of hope in a long lost love, if it had ever been love at all. Her mind told her, though not sure of its coherency, that her thoughts lacked any kind of rationality, but she dismissed them every time they entered into her consciousness, for she tended to think more with her heart, hoping and believing that love would indeed find a way. She didn't know if she wanted to spit at that thought and trample it beneath her feet as she walked away or if she wanted to embrace it all the more and hold on, though for what reason, she didn't know.

Growing ever more weary, her eyelids grew heavy, yet her mind refused to slip away into slumber. Her breathing paused for a moment when she heard a faint cry in the other room. No doubt that it was the cry of her daughter, Angela, who she felt was the only person in her life she truly loved. She didn't hesitate a moment longer. Pushing the covers away in an instant and crossing her arms in front of her abdomen, in order to prevent from freezing to death, she went to her daughter.

When she reached Angela's bedroom, the young mother listened for her daughter's voice. She heard soft whimpers coming from the bed as she entered the room.

"Mommy, it's...it's so cold," Angela whispered, her teeth chattering.

"I'm terribly sorry, love," she said to her child, stroking Angela's golden hair delicately as she sat down on the bed. "You know Mommy doesn't make enough money to pay for all the utilities. This month it was the heating bill that I couldn't afford." She paused for a moment, then added with hesitation in her voice, "I'm sorry, Angela."

"I know..." Angela drifted off.

Angela cast her pupils off to the side, almost as if she were refusing to look her mother in the eyes and acknowledge her very presence. The child suddenly coughed, wheezing as she tried to gain control of her breathing. Alarmed, the young mother patted her daughter on the back, trying to clear her clogged trachea.

"Angela... are- are you okay, darling?"

Coughing her last bit, Angela nodded, her eyes watery from the fit of coughing. Again, she turned her eyes away from her mother, staring at the wall for answers to questions she couldn't form.

Suddenly, the little girl spoke, each word resonating off the hard, emotionless wall and filling the bitter cold air.

"I tried to be a good girl, Mommy. I- I tried so hard not to think about him," Angela whispered in fear, "but, but he just won't go away. He...he was in my dreams again, telling me how bad I am, how I wasn't really his."

"I understand," Angela's worried mother choked, not finding the right words to satisfy her daughter's fears. "I wish there was an easy answer. I wish there was something I could do."

"I know..." Angela's voice faded into the bleak silence of the night. There was something holding itself back inside her, but fear drove it deeper into her mind. The young woman could feel her daughter's fear being aroused within her own heart, but she didn't want to frighten the girl by bringing up bad memories.

Not sure what else she could possibly say that would bring any sort of comfort to her frightened daughter, the worried mother leaned over and planted a gentle kiss on the top of her daughter's head. "Try to get some sleep, okay?"

Angela's eyes were downcast as her mother pulled away, and unable to bring herself to leave her daughter in this state, she nestled her child close to heart. Blinking back the onset of tears as she glanced down at the sorry state of her only child, her eyes were becoming more and more glassy by the moment. She loved her daughter dearly and only wanted the best for her, but her worst fears sprung up uncontrollably, afraid she would lose her daughter if she didn't start to take better care of her, but how could she? How could she even afford the basic necessities for this child without a job, without money? She pushed those thoughts quickly out of her mind, and after a long moment, she managed to choke out a few half-empty words. "Look at me, Angela," she almost pleaded. "Look at me straight in the eyes."

Angela's eyes gazed upward from that downcast position she had held for so long, and her eyes met those of her mother. In the darkness, a beam of moonlight found its way into the broken household through a small window near the ceiling. It reflected off Angela's pupils, and her mother looked deeply into those very pupils and found in them a bit of hope, an innocence that had not yet been lost.

"I love you," she whispered, bringing her dearest daughter into a warm, comforting embrace on the tattered bed. In the cold of the world all around them, they found in each other the warmth they needed.

"And I love you, Mommy."

Angela placed her tiny, thin arms around her mother's upper body. The mother tried to smile, but she knew she had little reason to do so. Seeing how thin her daughter was, she cursed herself silently for not being able to provide for her. Releasing her hold on the child, she gently returned Angela to the bed and pulled the covers over her. Standing up, she turned around one last time as she made her way across the desolate room. Closing the door, it clicked into place, sending echoes through the corridor. The young woman returned to her bedroom in a state of almost complete hopelessness and lay down again, eventually falling into a restless sleep.

"I beg you, Josh! Don't you dare hit her!"

"Oh, Kat, shut your damn mouth! This little brat deserves what's coming to her. Can't you see? She's spilled paint all over my best work shirt!"

Josh approached a little girl, who Kat knew all too well. The little child quivered in the corner in sheer fright of her father. She tried desperately to cling to the shadows and hide away, hoping her father wouldn't find her and strike her again, but the fairly large man grabbed the girl by the arm and pulled her into the center of the room.

"I'll teach you to mess with me, you worthless piece of trash!" Josh bellowed, bringing his hand to her left cheek. The mighty blow smashed into the girl's porcelain face, turning the once ivory skin a crimson red. He continued for the next few minutes to abuse the poor child, and Kat hid her face in her hands, crying feverishly, feeling utterly worthless and ashamed, knowing there was nothing she could do to stop her husband from striking the child.

"Angela!" Kat cried out, awakening from the nightmare.

Kat looked around at her surroundings in great confusion, and when she realized where she was, she tried to calm herself. Sweat was pouring from her temples, and her hair was moist. She listened attentively for an answer, but Angela must have been sound asleep in the next room. Kat arose from the bed again and returned to her daughter's room, finding the child fast asleep in her bed.

"Thank heavens," Kat mumbled and went back to her room.

Turning to face the clock, Kat noticed that only a little over an hour had passed since she had last looked at it. Time was a strange thing, hardly ever seeming constant, often seeming like it never went at the same perpetual velocity. It was as if it sped up around the turns and curves and slowed down along the long, straight stretches of road down the path of life. Time was a little significance to Kat, though, for she felt herself slowly drifting further away from time with each passing second.

Next to the alarm clock on her nightstand was a picture of her daughter, but she couldn't look at it without sadness lingering in her thoughts. Bringing her delicate hand down in a quick gesture, she pushed the frame down so the front of the picture was facing down at the surface of the stand and so she didn't have to be tempted to see the face of someone she loved so much, but also the same face that she at times couldn't bear to view.

Kat's gaze wheeled over to the window, where she noticed snowflakes falling outside. They fell in a wintry ballet of magic, and she recalled how, as a child, she would spend hours upon hours peering out the window in her bedroom at her parents' cottage, simply watching the beauty of Mother Nature as she covered the earth with a protective blanket, and marveling at the wonder of it all. Much to her amazement, Kat found herself lost in the magic as she gazed at the falling snow, and then she drifted again...

There she was, a few years younger than she was now, sitting at a booth in the local diner. It was a late autumn evening, and the chilly wind blew into the restaurant as a few customers entered, seeking a place for a hot cup of coffee in the waning weather. Kat focused on her hands as she played aimlessly with a napkin between her figures, giving little heed to the person who was sitting across from her at the table. The paper napkin began to fall apart around the edges at she relentlessly fidgetted with it, so she found herself pulling it apart, ripping it first down the center and then into smaller and smaller pieces, until there was nothing left but tiny shreds of frail paper.

Dare she look up? She hestitated for a moment before she allowed her eyes to turn their gaze upward just ever so slightly, and the moment she was able to see who was sitting across from her, she wished she hadn't looked up. She gasped, but she quickly recovered herself. Reaching for the cup of coffee that was nearest to her, she took a long, deep drink, and as the warm liquid flowed down her insides, she craved the flavor all the more.

"Ya know, Kat, you drink way too much of that ol' stuff. It's not good for ya," the voice spoke rather harshly.

For some reason, that voice brought anger to her lips, and she spat, "Like I have anything else!"

Now glaring at the person across from her, she knew it was him. It was Josh. Josh merely strugged his shoulders and shook his head. His narrow, brown eyes focused on Kat's young face, almost admiring her as if she were an object of affection. Josh frowned when he saw the dark circles that had made their homes under her eyes, and without much concern, he said dryly, "Ya really outta get yerself some sleep, little lady."

At this, Kat slammed her cup down that had been clutched between her sweaty palms. The saucer broke when it cup hit it, stattering across the table, and coffee escaped from the broken vessel and spilled all over the place. The loud noise startled the both of them and...

And Kat woke up again. Unable to handle being in her room any longer, she grabbed her robe and slippers and ran down the stairs until she was outside. The snow was falling harder than ever, and she looked up at the night sky and spun in circles, trying to force all the pain and frustration out of her mind. It was so quiet outside, so peaceful indeed, and the more she spun, the more she felt as if she were floating, flying and dancing with the snowflakes. She closed her eyes, and everything went black. Spinning, spinning, turning, turning, falling, falling, and finally, smack!

Her eyes jolted open. She found herself lying in a soft, oversized bed. The sun was shining brightly through the window, and she sighed contentedly as the warmth of its refreshing rays landed on her face. It felt so good to be here.

Kat glanced down at her body, noticing that she wore a beautiful pale pink satin nightgown, and she could see her long, golden hair hanging down over her bosom in wavy tresses. For some reason, she didn't remember going to bed wearing that gown, nor did she remember having her hair down. She yawned as she stretched, and she then lept out of the bed. There was an oak dresser in front of her as she stood next to the bed, so she approached it and started brushing her hair, humming a sweet melody. The face she saw in the mirror reflected her young age of twenty-four years.

While she was lost looking at herself, she heard a voice call her name from the doorway. Turning around, she smiled, pleased to see that her husband was there waiting for her.

"I'll be right there, Luke," she said with a sincere smile.

Luke, a tall and well-built man in his late thirties, returned in response with a smile. "I'll see you down in the kitchen then," he replied, and he turned and left.

Kat shook her head, as if she were trying to clear it from thinking too much, and she focused on preparing her thoughts logically for the day that lay ahead. Before she was ready to go downstairs for breakfast, she decided to take a hot and relaxing bath, a good way to start off the day. Entering the bathroom that was off the master bedroom in which she slept, she flipped the lightswitch on and proceeded to walk over to bathtub. With a quick turn of the knobs, water began pouring from the faucet and filling the basin. Kat turned away from tub for a moment to examine the array of scented oils on the shelf.

"Hmmm, what should I try today?" she mused to herself. "Peach? Nah... strawberry? No... not that one..." She ran her finger over the labels until she came to the one she desired. "Vanilla," she smiled. "Now that's it."

She continued to prepare her bath by pouring a bit of the vanilla-scented bath oil into the water. Soap suds began forming, and once the water reached a satisfactory level, Kat turned the water off and dipped into the nearly full tub. "Ahhh," she moaned, feeling the warm water penetrate every pore of her body. "This is just want I needed."

Closing her eyes, Kat felt like she was floating in a sea of magic. Images of swirling patterns of different colors formed in her mind behind her closed eyes, and the patterns grew in size and complexity until they started to form objects and people. She drifted into a light sleep, but it deepened as the minutes passed, and amid all the faces she saw, one and only one stood out. It was him again! It was Josh!

"You!" she screamed.

In an instant, her eyes jolted open, and she found herself gasping for air. The water all around her felt freezing cold, and the sensation caused her body to go numb. She went still for a moment, but then she felt two hands around her head, pulling upward. Coming out of her frozen position, she panicked and flailed her arms wildly in the air, yelling, "Let go of me! Let go!"

"Shhh, calm down, sweetheart," replied a calm voice. "It's me, Luke. See?"

Kat blinked a few times, focusing her eyesight. She looked at him. Indeed, it was Luke, not Josh.

"Luke?" she asked, perplexed. "Wha- What happened?"

"I heard you screaming, so I ran upstairs to see if you were okay, and your head was underneath the water. I pulled you out to prevent you from drowning... Kat, are you alright?"

"I- I don't know," she stammered, trying to organize her thoughts. "I was just relaxing in here, and I must have accidently fallen asleep. I didn't mean to scare you, darling. I'm sorry."

"Well, the important thing that that you're alright. Now, let me help you out. You've been sitting in cold water."

"No, I'll be okay. I can get out just fine..."

"You're absolutely sure? Kat, I don't want you to get hurt again," Luke said firmly, but softly. "I've been married to you for two years now, and you've never done anything like that."

What more could she say? Kat was just as confused, if not more so, than her husband. His questions were only being asked out of concern, but she felt almost annoyed by them, for her mind was whirling in the perplexity of the dreams she had had the previous night and just moments ago, and more than anything, she was lost as to who this Josh person might be. Her thoughts were cluttered. She wanted to tell Luke, but at the same time, she didn't. She wasn't sure how to phrase the dream just right, or how to even make it coherent without being afraid she would come across sounding foolish.

Kat realized she had been drifting out of regular consciousness when Luke spoke again, "Kat? Hello? Are you okay?"

She blinked a couple of times and shook her head, hoping it would somehow clear her mind. "Huh?" she replied dumbly. "Uh, oh... I'm fine. Yeah, I swear. Jo- I mean, Luke, I'll see you downstairs in a few minutes, okay?"

Luke had a somewhat confused and worried expression on his face, but with a sigh, he replied, "Okay."

When Luke had left the bathroom, Kat stood up and left the water out of the tub. She placed a towel around her body and went to the mirror, clearing the moisture off of it so she could see herself clearly. She leaned over the vanity, so close that her face was no more than an inch away from the surface of the mirror. The eyes in her reflection looked directly into her own, and she stared long and hard into them, thinking that she could somehow see inside herself, trying to figure out what was really going on inside.

Blinking, Kat moved away from the mirror a couple of inches and refocused her sight on her image in the mirror. "What's wrong with me?" she muttered to herself.

It was no use. Why waste any more time staring at herself? Kat figured it best to try and forget about last night and the incident in the bathtub and focus on the day ahead. After all, she was a perfectly sane and normal human being. Why should she worry about a silly dream? She almost laughed aloud to herself as she dried off, thinking it foolish for having over-reacted to a mere dream or two.

Once she had finished drying her curvy body, she returned the towel neatly to the rack and returned to her bedroom. Quickly, she threw on a pair of sweat pants and a T-shirt and went downstairs for breakfast. Luke had been quite the gentleman for preparing breakfast for his wife, and Kat couldn't help but to smile as she sat down to a plate of pancakes and immediately smothered them in maple syrup.

"Thank you, dear," Kat said, looking directly at her husband's face. Although he was much older than her, he didn't look his age. Luke's dark brown hair was thick and wavy, and there was only a minimal amount of gray hair near his temples. His dark blue eyes gave Kat a slightly strange look as she began to eat breakfast.

"What are you wearing?" he asked, confused and taken a bit aback by Kat's low-key outfit. Kat was usually the type to dress in the finer brands of clothes, and she would always follow the same routine every morning as she prepared herself for the day. After waking up, she took a bath and then dressed in silken fabrics, whether it be in a skirt or pants. Her normally well-done hair, which she preferred to wear pinned back in a clip at the base of her neck, was hanging loosely around her face today. She hadn't even brushed it.

Kat's facial expression turned from one of delight to one of annoyance. She became defensive and retorted, "Do you have a problem with what I'm wearing, Luke? If you do, why don't you stop beating around the bush and just say so? And if you do indeed have a problem, deal with it. I'll wear what I like, thank you."

Not knowing how to respond to Kat's remarks, Luke frowned and glanced down at his plate. He blinked a couple of times, thinking about what he could say that would make her happy. It seemed this day was already turning out to be a rough one, and they weren't even through breakfast yet. He hated to see her angry, so bringing his hands to hers, he tenderly held them, saying, "I meant nothing by it, darling. Please understand that it was just a simple question. It's just that... well, first there was that incident in the tub, which has never happened before, and then I noticed that you were wearing something that I've never seen you wear unless you're sick. Are you ill? The flu, perhaps?"

Kat sighed. Should she tell him all the thoughts that were racing through her mind? She wasn't one to come across as someone who made up stories, and because her dreams seemed so real, they seemed more than mere stories to her. Would Luke be angry because she dreamt about another man, a man who, as far as she could tell, only existed in her imagination? She cursed herself silently for being afraid to talk to the man who loved her more than anything in the world. Kat kept her eyes downcast for another minute before she had the courage to stare at her husband straight in the eyes.

"Maybe I am sick," she lied weakly. It was the easy way out. She had to make up something that seemed believable, lest she risk revealing a part of her that she wasn't sure she wanted to reveal. Kat wasn't even sure if she believed what was going on in her mind, so she dared not tell anyone else, at least not until she felt more in control of her thoughts.

"Well, you should stay home today then," Luke replied. "I've really got to get to work now, so you get yourself plenty of rest, and I'll see you when I come home, okay?"

"Okay," Kat smiled falsely.

Luke removed his dirty plate from the table and placed it in the dishwasher. He bent over and kissed Kat on the top of her head gently, saying, "I love you. Good bye."

"You, too... Bye..."

Luke grabbed his coat and briefcase next to the door and left in a hurry. The door closed, and Kat sat alone now, stirring her coffee aimlessly with a spoon. She looked out the window and sighed. "What's really wrong with me?"

Chapter Two

The morning passed slowly as Kat wondered about her dreams, about her thoughts, about many things, especially Josh. She decided it best to make herself a fresh cup of coffee, hoping the caffeine might perhaps calm her nerves. As she filled the top of the maker with coffee grounds, she vaguely remembered dreaming about a conversation she had had in a restaurant with Josh... one about coffee. She sighed, frustrated that as the day wore on, the memories of her dreams became more and more blurry. She wasn't sure if she wanted to completely forget those dreams or if she wanted to remember them, for although they bothered her, she couldn't seem to get them out of her mind.

She stood there, leaning on the kitchen counter top, with her elbows resting heavily upon the surface. The coffee maker had stopped by now, and the pot was now full of fresh, wonderfully-scented coffee. Kat instantly grabbed her favorite mug and filled her cup to the brim. Bringing the cup to her mouth for the first delightful sip, she breathed in the aroma and smiled, whispering, "French vanilla..."

As Kat took a few small sips from her mug, she walked into the living room, where she sat down on the couch. She mindlessly turned on the TV and flipped through the channels, not really paying any attention to what was on any of them. After about five minutes, however, she grew bored and turned the TV off again, moaning aloud to herself, "What am I gonna do today?"

Kat's eyes turned their full attention to the window, where she noticed the snow melting. The grass was showing in some areas of the yard, and the trees had water dripping off their branches, preparing for spring with their tiny buds. It was mid-March, and Kat knew that this was probably the end of the snow until next winter. She thought about how hard it had snowed in her dream and how she loved the snow. When the world was coming alive again, Kat felt like she was dying in a way. Her snowy wonderland would disappear for many more months, and her memories of watching the snowflakes fall gracefully would become engraved in the back of her mind as just another memory.

The coffee was gone by now, and despite the caffeine that was now in her body, she felt a sudden rush of tiredness come over her. She covered up in the blue fleece blanket that was draped over the side of the couch, and she lay down, bringing her head to one of the throw pillows. All she wanted to do was sleep...

Ring! Ring! Ring!

The sudden sound of the phone ringing woke Kat right up. She wasted no time and darted straight for the phone. As she picked it up, she tried to find her voice. She hesitated for a moment and then spoke, "H-Hello?"

"Hello, Kat," replied a rather gruff voice. "Did ya miss me?"

Kat swallowed nervously and felt her stomach down inside of herself. "Who-who is this?"

"Oh, don't give me that rubbish," the same harsh voice continued. "You know damn well who this is."

"I'm afraid you have the wrong number, sir..."

"Oh, is that so? Likely story from you, Kat. Then how do I know your name? Lucky guess?"

"I-I don't know you," her voice grew weary. "Please don't call here again."

Before the man on the other end of the phone could reply, Kat hung the phone up. It was at that moment when she realized something odd: Her surroundings had completely changed. The kitchen she was now standing in was barely larger than a bathroom, and there were dishes piled high in the sink. The walls and floor appeared old and dirty, and on the tiny table were piles upon piles of papers. Kat rushed over to the table and panicked when she saw that the papers were unpaid bills from the past several weeks.

"This can't be my house," she said frantically, trying to convince herself otherwise.

When she picked up one of the bills, however, she noticed that her name was printed clearly on it: Katrina Beaumont. She dropped the bill and gasped, falling into a seated position on the chair. Bringing her hands to her face, she began to cry feverishly. "This isn't real. This isn't real," she told herself over and over again.

"Mommy?" came a small voice from the doorway. "What's not real?"

Kat was taken by surprise by the voice of the child standing there, and she jerked her head away from her hands. Something in the child's eyes told her that this child was real, that this child belonged to her. Kat rubbed the tears from her eyes and tried to smile.

"Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you."

The little girl walked over to Kat and looked at her straight in the eyes and asked, "Why were you crying, Mommmy?"

Kat thought for a minute about what to tell the child. "It's quite silly, really, my dear. You see, Mommy had this wonderful dream last night that she was rich and lived in a big house, and then I woke up to find myself here, seeing the condition of this horrible place and all these bills I've left unpaid... Oh, Angela, reality is hitting me really hard right now. I don't know where I ever got the crazy idea that I didn't really live in this place. It's all coming back to me now, how last night I saw the fear in your eyes as you woke up from that horrible dream you had... Oh, darling, I'm so sorry for scaring you."

Angela's eyes spoke words that she couldn't find to produce with her seven-year-old lips. If anything were real, it was the love Angela had for her mother, for it seemed that no one could possibly come between the two. Angela tried to smile, but she suddenly had a look of shame on her face.

"What's wrong, honey?" Kat asked, confused by the child's sorrowful expression.

"I- I did it again, Mommy..." she trailed off.

Kat thought for a moment. What was she talking about? When she failed to recall any memory of what Angela was referring to, Kat asked again, "What's wrong? What happened?"

"I-" Angela's eyes looked down at the floor. Kat's eyes began to follow her daughter's eyes, moving down the girl's body. When she came to the child's private area, however, Kat noticed the pajama bottoms were wet between the legs. Kat realized that this must have been what Angela was afraid to tell her.

"Did you wet the bed, Angela?" she questioned gently.

"Mommy, I'm sorry," Angela whimpered, large tears starting to well up in her eyes. "I know I shoulda went to the bathroom, but I didn't feel anything... and... and it was just like this when I woke up this morning."

Kat felt like she herself was to blame for her daughter's embarrassment over the whole incident. She couldn't recall ever yelling at Angela for wetting herself, even if she was a bit old to be doing so.

"I'm not mad at you, honey," Kat reassured her dear child. "Come here."

Angela hesitated for a brief moment, but then she quickly came to her mother's warm and loving embrace. Kat didn't mind if the dampness from Angela's bottoms was getting on her clothes. There were more important things to worry about at that time. After a few minutes had passed, Kat loosened her arms and whispered, "Go take a quick bath and change your clothes, Angela. Remember that the hot water isn't working, so the water will be cold when you go to step into the tub. While you're doing that, I'll take care of the sheets and your jammies, okay?"

"'Kay," Angela replied, barely above a faint whisper.

The child ran off in the direction of her bedroom, leaving Kat with her thoughts. Why had Angela been so afraid and ashamed to admit to her own mother the fact that she had wet the bed? True, what had happened was a bit embarrassing and would be so for most seven-year-old children, but Kat didn't think her own daughter should have to be quite so humiliated by such a trivial thing toward her mother. Had those nightmares Angela told her about the previous night been the cause of her bed-wetting? Kat just didn't know. She was already beginning to feel a headache coming on, and now, more than ever, she wished she really were in her dreamland, living in that big, expensive house and happily married.

Kat went into Angela's bedroom and began to remove the soiled sheets from the bed when she noticed something peculiar on the sheets. What looked like blood stains were speckled in several areas on the pink sheets, and Kat began to feel dizzy at the sight of them. She hated the sight of blood, no matter how old the blood was. She felt herself become light-headed, and she fell to the ground in a heavy thump.

The feeling on hitting the hard floor startled Kat half to death, and her eyes jerked open. Sunlight was pouring in through the windows all around her, and it took a few seconds for her eyes to adjust to the sudden change in brightness. Once she was able to see cleary, though, she noticed that she was back in the living room of the house she shared with Luke. She turned, looking behind her, and the couch where she had been asleep was right there. The blue fleece blanket was on the floor next to her, and she saw her coffee mug sitting on the end table. Was it all just a horrible dream? If it was, why was she having visions of Angela again? Why was she back in the same condemned house with a child who had nightmares and wetted the bed?

Ring! Ring! Ring!

The sound of the ringing phone startled the hell out of Kat. Who was calling her now? As she continued to sit there on the floor, she hesitated over whether or not she should even bother to pick up the phone, for fear that it would be the same gruff and menacing voice she had heard before. But that was only in her dream, wasn't it? She second-guessed herself, and right before the answering machine was about to automatically answer the call, Kat darted for the kitchen and grabbed the receiver off the hook.

"H-Hello?" she asked, following with a nervous swallow.

"Kat, is that you?" replied a female's voice on the other end.

Hearing that the voice has female brought some relief to Kat, and she laughed nervously, "Yeah, it's me. Who is this?"

"Duh? Hello? Kat, don't you know the voice of your best friend in the whole world?" the lady teased. "It's me, Rosalyn."

Kat felt stupid now for not knowing who it was, so she produced a weird chuckle into the phone, saying, "Of course I know it's you, Rosie! I'm sorry... blonde moment there. Heh, heh, so... how are ya? What's been up with you?"

"Well," Rosie's voice bubbled up, "I've got some great news. You're gonna be my matron of honor-"

"Oh, my God!" Kat exclaimed, unable to hold in her excitement. "You mean... you're- you're engaged?! Oh, that's great! Tell me everything. How did he do it? When? Where? What happened?"

"Oh, there's so much I wanna tell you, but I'd rather do it face to face. Do you want to meet me at the coffeehouse in a half hour?"

Kat glanced at the clock, noticing that it was already a quarter past two. Luke would be returning home in just a few short hours, and she wanted to be back in time to prepare dinner. "Well, I don't have too much time this afternoon, but okay, what the heck? I'll do it! Oh, I can't wait to hear all about it. You've gotta swear you'll tell me everything."

"Sure thing, girl," Rosie's voice beamed. "I'll see ya there."

"'Kay, bye!"

Kat hung up the phone in pure excitement. All the thoughts she had been having about Josh, Angela, and that other strange "life" disappeared, and the overwhelming feeling of joy for her best friend took hold of her mind. She made a face of disgust at the frompy clothes she was wearing and dashed upstairs to change into something that was more tasteful.

She opened the closet doors and began rummaging through the many colorful clothes she owned. She was one who liked looking stylish and chic when she dressed. Since it was not too cold outside that day, she decided on a long, black skirt that flowed gracefully to the ground and a red, satin blouse that buttoned down the front. Kat brushed her locks, pulling them off her neck and into a neat bun on the top of her head. Since she hadn't bothered to do so earlier, Kat proceeded to finish her look by applying some make up, just a bit of charcoal-colored eyeliner and ruby red lipstick. With that, she was ready, so she grabbed her purse and coat and went out the door.

The drive to the coffeehouse wouldn't take more than five minutes as she drove into town. It was a quaint, little place where local people gathered to have nice, long chats and enjoy each other's presence. The house was privately owned by an elderly couple and had been in business for over fifty years, and as Kat pulled into the parking lot, she smiled at the familiar, welcoming place. She proceeded to leave the car and walk into the coffeehouse, where she was greeted with a few friendly hellos from townsfolk sitting along the counter where Mr. and Mrs. Chaplin brewed their fresh pots of delightful coffee and baked delicious pastries.

The old, wooden floor boards creaked beneath Kat's feet as she walked further into the room, and over in the corner, she noticed Rosie seated with a steaming cup of coffee held in her young hands. A smile spread across Kat's face, and Rosie's face lit up with the same joy when she saw her friend coming closer to her. Standing up, Rosie wasted no time in hugging her dear best friend, and Kat returned the hug, remarking, "It's been a long time, girl... too long if you ask me."

"Yeah, it's been a while," admitted Rosie, half-sheepishly. "Well, we're here now, together. Come, sit down... we've got a lot to talk about."

Kat joined Rosie at the tiny table, and without having to ask, the waitress brought a cup of coffee and placed it in front of Kat.

Sipping the hot beverage carefully, Kat's eyes focused on her friend across the table. Rosie was always the bubbly one in their friendship, and it showed clearly on her face when she smiled. Rosie had a smile that could light up the very room she walked in. Last time Kat had seen Rosie, her hair was long and curly from a perm, but now it was quite different. Her new hairstyle hung in straight tresses a little past her shoulders with face-framing layers. Her natural light brown color had been lightened to a strawberry blonde, which Kat thought suited her well. Rosie's eyes looked even greener than last time, perhaps due to new contacts, but Kat couldn't be sure.

"So, look at you," Kat mused. "When did this big transformation take place?"

"Oh, you mean my hair?" laughed Rosie aimlessly. "Well, that was about a month ago. I had it done right before I left France."

"Yeah, you were there a long time. How long was it?"

"Nearly two years... gee, how time flies," continued Rosie. "I finished my masters in foreign studies, so now I'm home for a little while."

"A little while?" asked Kat, confused and a bit concerned.

"Oh, I didn't tell you all about the big proposal yet, did I? How silly of me. Well, he's from Cali, and we met in France. Yep, that's the gist of it, but it's quite a long story. The dating, the falling in love... ya know, the 'usual' stuff that goes along with romance... 'til one day he comes up to me with a dozen red roses in his hand and a nervous smile on his face. We were to be graduating in just a week, and it would be our last weekend in Paris. We were on one of the bridges over the Seine, and it was in the City of Romance that he proposed to me. Oh, Kat! It was like a dream! He got down on one knee right there in front of me, and as the moonlight reflected off his pupils, he asked for my hand... and then he pulled out the most beautiful diamond ring and slipped it on my finger..."

Rosie sighed contentedly as she recalled the lovely memory from that recent experience. Kat could see the diamond sparkling from Rosie's left ring finger, and she felt quite happy for her dear friend.

"That's wonderful," Kat simply replied. "I couldn't be happier for you. So, do you know when the big day is?"

"This June, the 15th."

"June?" Kat almost exclaimed. "That- that's only three months away!"

"Yeah, I know, but why wait? You're only young once, and hell, I'm gonna be twenty-five in August."

"Well, I wish you two the best of luck. So, I take it you're not getting married locally?"

"No, probably not. I'm only living with my parents temporarily until I move out to Californ-i-a. Do you think you'll be able to make it out there for the wedding? I really, really want you to be my matron of honor."

"Sure thing," Kat smiled, although in her mind she was saddened by the thought of her best friend leaving her again. She had just returned, and after all this time, Kat thought it would be like old times... just the two of them, but it wasn't that way anymore. Kat knew she was married, but she still felt like she needed someone like Rosie around. There were some things she needed to talk to a woman about, and no matter how much Luke cared, the simple fact that he was a man meant he wasn't able to understand some of the things Kat had on her mind.

Kat's thoughts were causing her to drift off again, but right before she lost herself completely, she heard Rosie's voice, "Kat, are you okay?"

Kat didn't respond. She was gone.

Chapter Three

Blackness. Sheer and utter blackness surrounded her form, and she felt her arms out in front of her, extended, searching for something, anything to hold on to. It was quite unnerving to feel absolutely nothing, and then Kat realized something even stranger: She wasn't standing on anything but thin air. The moment she came to this realization, however, she immediately panicked and began to fall into what could out be described as a bottomless abyss.

When she tried to scream, her mouth open wide, no sound came out, and no vibrations travelled across her vocal chords. Kat helplessly flailed her limbs about and closed her eyes so tight that she felt the pressure would burst them in the very sockets. The temperature dropped considerably, until she could no longer move or even breathe. The air pressure dropped until all traces of air disappeared, as well. And then...

Bang!

Everything came rushing back to her in an instant. All her senses returned. He felt the ground, hard and painful against her aching back. The air was heavy and thick, but it was warm. She felt tears stinging her eyes, and she finally opened them to see...

"Rosie?" Kat choked out, relieved and in shock.

Rosie's face came slowly into focus as Kat blinked a couple of times. She wiped the tears away, embarrassed, and sat up, realizing that she was sitting on the floor in the middle of the aisle at the coffee shop. Looking around, she noticed that customers seated at the other tables were casting strange looks in her direction. She stood up and nearly fell over again, feeling dizzy, but Rosie grabbed her arm and sat her down in a chair.

Rosie sat down across the table from Kat and looked at her intently for several long minutes. Her friend fidgetted with the lid on her empty coffee cup, her eyes wandering between it and Kat's clenched hands.

"Are you okay?" Rosie finally asked.

"I-" Kay began. "I don't know..."

"What happened?"

"I wish I knew."

"Well, to me, it looked like you fainted, girl. Maybe you should go home and get yourself some sleep, huh?"

Kat blinked at Rosie as if her words made no sense. Fainted? That was all? But why? All the other times, Kat remembered seeing people... a dump of a house... a small child named... What was her name? This time, though, everything about life as she knew it was just gone, disappeared out of thin air.

"Kat?" Rosie's voice drew her back to reality.

"Huh?" Kat asked, confused. "Oh- oh, yes... go home... sleep... Yes, I'll do that."

"Okay, hon," Rosie said, not sounding too convinced. "You do that, and I'll call ya tomorrow, 'kay?"

"Sure thing," Kat replied as she stood up and pushed the chair in, feigning a smile.

Not wasting another minute, Kat paid the cashier for her coffee and walked straight out to her car. The drive home did nothing to calm her already frayed nerves. It was now rush hour traffic, so the streets were jammed full with cars, everyone wanting to be home in a hurry. As is always the case with rush hour traffic, however, the drive took longer than usual. Kat stopped at a red light only a couple of blocks from home, and when the light turned green, traffic was stuck because of cars blocking the intersection going across in the other direction. She wanted to scream, to tell those idiots to hurry up, that she didn't have all day, but what good would it have done her? She glared at the car in front of her, muttering obscenities under her breath. Finally, the said car inched forward, and just as the light was turning yellow, Kat managed to make her way across the congested intersection.

The rest of the drive was not as horrible, but overall, she was quite fed up by the time she pulled into the driveway. She slammed the door extra hard and stomped into the house, flipping the kitchen light on and kicking her shoes off in a huff.

"And now," she mumbled sarcastically, "I have the oh-so-wonderful honors of making dinner. It's not enough I've been blacking in and out all damn day..."

She opened the refrigerator and pulled out some chicken. Luckily, it had thrawed, so she prepared it for the oven and turned on the timer. Then, she absently cut up some potatoes and placed them on the stove to boil. Cooking was one of Kat's favorite past times, and usually, it was quite calming for her. Although it did distract her from thinking about her day, she was still feeling disconcerted, to say the least, when her husband came waltzing through the door.

Coming toward his wife, Luke embraced her lovingly and planted a kiss right on the tip of her nose. "I see you've changed your clothes," he remarked. "Are you feeling any better?"

Kat looked into his soft eyes and smiled, feeling all her worries melt away in an instant. "I am now," she replied, kissing him on the lips.

Luke returned the smile and walked over to the table, awaiting dinner patiently. Kat served the food promptly, and they sat down to a rather pleasant meal. Kat didn't mention her strange blackouts or visions, but they spoke about what they did that day, mostly Luke retelling stories of so-and-so having a secret affairs with such-and-such a person at work.

He finally stopped the mindless prattle and said, "So, honey, what did you do today?"

"Well, Rosie is getting married," she smiled.

"That's good news," Luke replied, nodding. "Did she call you?"

"Yeah, and then we met for coffee. She asked me to be her matron of honor."

"Did you say yes?"

"Well, of course I did, silly!" Kat laughed. "Rosie's my best friend in the whole world. Why wouldn't I have said yes?"

Luke just shook his head and rolled his eyes, smirking and thinking, Women.

They finished the meal in silence and cleaned up. By then, the hour had grown late, and Kat yawned as she sat down on the couch. Luke joined her, placing his arm around her shoulders. Together, they just sat there in the silence of the late winter's eve, listening intently to the faint noises outside. Kat didn't realize she had been slowly crying until Luke brought his lips to her face and kissed the tears away under her eyes. Cupping her chin, he brought his mouth to hers and kissed her deeply and passionately, and Kat felt like she was on fire.

Luke abruptly broke the kiss and asked softly, "Why were you crying?"

"I- I'm not sure," she stuttered.

He smiled at her and said, "Come, let's go to the bedroom... I promise that whatever is bothering you will go away."

Kat noticed the hint of naughtiness and flirtatiousness in his tone as he said this, and she smiled devilishly at her husband. "Mmm, I like the sound of that very much."

They walked, hand in hand, to the bedroom. After candles were lit and the drapes were drawn shut, Luke gently led Kat to the king-sized bed. Placing his strong hands behind her head, he eased her to a pillow and lay her down so that her body was stretched out across the mattress.

Luke gently brought his body down onto hers and began kissing her neck, moving slowly up, then down, and up again. He worked his way along her delicate jawline, his hands entwined in her golden hair, massaging her scalp. As he brought his mouth down over hers, he moved his hands to her chest and began to work his magic on her soft breasts, kneading them in a sensual, circular motion. Kat placed her hands on his shoulders, her nails digging into his skin through the fabric of his shirt.

Next, Kat felt the buttons on her blouse begin to become undone, one by one, until all of her tummy was exposed. Luke planted kisses all over her flat abdomen, gradually moving toward her private area in a tantalizing, teasing manner. She moaned and groaned with pleasure, forgetting that the world beyond their bedroom even existed. Kat's fingers were now running through his copper hair as she arched into his welcoming touch.

Before she knew what was happening, her shirt and bra had been completely removed, and her husband was now topless. He lay on top of her once again, skin on skin, the heat eminating from their turned on bodies. Then, he pleasured her by suckling one tender nipple as he played with the other between his forefinger and thumb, gently flickering the taunt tip of her breast. He caressed the whole breast and then switched to the mouth, giving her unending amounts of satisfaction with his fluid movements.

Teasingly, he lifted his mouth from her breast just enough to whisper, "You like that?"

She moaned an incoherent "yes."

"I've got more to give you."

With that, he unzipped her skirt and slid it off, leaving her clad only in her panties. Luke stroked the sensitive area between her legs as she pushed harder and harder into him with intense desire building inside her. She was now cligging onto him, silently demanding to be pleased to the fullest of his abilities, and oh, did he have abilities to please to the fullest, deepest, and most delightful extent. She felt his erection rubbing against her thigh, and she knew he wouldn't be able to resist much longer.

"And just what it is you want?" Luke asked, taunting her on purpose as he rubbed her privates.

"Oh, you know what I want," Kat whispered.

"Are you sure?"

"Oh, yessss," she purred, surrendering completely to his touch.

Luke stopped for only a brief moment as he removed his pants and boxers, and then he began to pull Kat's panties slowly down her legs. She yearned tell him to hurry up, lest she come prematurely. She wanted the man in her for that part. He gave her a rather wicked grin and finally pulled the little piece of cloth over her feet and threw it on the floor with the other stripped clothing.

He eased slowly into her, penetrating her until she was filled. He moved in, out, in, out as she bucked her hips. Bringing his mouth to hers once again, he kissed her passionately, their tongues intertwining and wrestling, and their hands explored each other's bodies as they gave into the full urge to make love in the most raw and unbound way. It was sheer and pure ecstacy, this giving and taking on both parts, and together, bound as one on the bed, it was hard to tell where one person ended and the other began. Their naked forms mixed and mingled, melting profusely into each other and losing themselves in the act of surrender at its fullest extent.

And then, they came together, pushing and feeling and just experiencing the high feeling of fulfillment on many levels. They reached their peak as one, and together, they felt their bodies heave into release and then completion. Luke stayed into her as he grew soft, and then they lay there on the bed, their bodies curled into each other. As the last moments of wakefulness passed, the darkness grew heavy around them as the candles flickered out, and they drifted into a dreamless sleep, lost to love.

Chapter Four

But her sleep was not dreamless.

Kat continued to be in a very deep sleep and was in the midst of a very confusing dream:

She opened her eyes and tried to focus, blackness stretching endlessly ahead. Extending her arms, she reached for nothing, her fingers grasping the open air. Dimly illuminated stone walls were down her left and right, but where was the light coming from? Not one lone window, not one single torch, nothing to light her way.

Taking a hesitant step, she moved slowly forward, and the air loomed heavily around her, resting mercilessly on her skin, as she broke into a cold sweat. Quivering step by step, she walked, knowing not what else to do. Silence so still, she swore she could hear something in it. Stopping and listening: bleak and utter silence, the kind that prickles fine hairs, sending a chill up, then down, her spine.

She grew weary and dizzy; her insides churned and turned. Ringing penetrated her ears; her mind whirled and swirled. Holding on to something: the cold air; she leaned on the damp, hard walls for support, a useless attempt.

Nothing was ahead still, so now where? Turning around, asking, "How did I get here?"

Breathing in, holding it, exhaling, and relaxing, she turned around and took one uncertain step. Preventing her aching foot from going anywhere, a wall stopped her from moving.

"Strange, was it always there?"

Sighing, she continued her pointless journey to who knows what end. Suddenly, coldness permeated her being. She looked in horror at the walls, as they were slowly losing their solidarity, becoming molten and gaseous, a weird cloud of grey closing in on her, mingling with her skin, its absolute zero freezing her still.

She winced in pain and closed her eyes to see blackness, but at least not that horrific grey. Then, from no where, a hand reached out, right there in front of her eyes. She could see no body, no face to whom it belonged. All she heard was a low, steady, calming voice: "You'll be okay."

She stirred, the dream ending, and she realized somewhere deep within her subconscious that this was how it felt to be saved from death. Strange, she thought, but why would I be dreaming about such a thing?

The night was still heavy and thick around her, and next to her in the king-sized bed her husband was sleeping soundly, light snores coming from his partly-opened mouth as his sturdy chest rose and fell with each breath. Kat smiled at his peaceful form and closed her eyes.

Several hours later, dawn's soft light moved across the room, melting away the night's shadows on her sleeping face. The beams cascaded their cleansing warmth down upon her scented skin, rejuvenating the senses beneath. With one slow, steady intake of precious air and then exhaling, Kat gradually was coming out of her reverie. As the wind blew gently through the slightly cracked-open window, playing melodies with her free hair, her placid form shifted slightly to the right. Her lips first parted before she opened her eyes to the beginning of the new day, and she whispered, "Good morning."

Beside her, Luke stirred and rolled onto his side to face her. A gentle smile formed across his lips before he opened his eyes and focused on her young face. Kat returned the smile, although she felt as if she were still somewhere between waking and dreaming. Her gaze was seemingly empty, and this was a bit unnerving to her husband.

"Dear, what is it?" he softly probed, bringing his hand to her cheek and stroking it slowly.

Leaning into the caress, Kat closed her eyes and moaned at the feel of his coarse fingers against her smooth skin. She wished to stay forever locked in this very moment in time and forget that the world around their forms on this welcoming bed even existed. Visions of her strange dream from the night came back into her mind, and her mouth frowned in consternation.

"Luke," Kat said suddenly, her eyes fluttering open once again, penetrating him for an explanation, some sort of reason for why she was having such visions.

"Yes?" Luke asked, concern coating his voice, drawing closer to her.

"Have- " she hesitated. "Have you ever known anyone who has had a near death experience?"

Luke blinked. Of all the questions he was prepared to have to answer, this was certainly not one of them.

"Uh, no..." he trailed off, shaking his head. "I'm sorry, darling, but, um, where did this suddenly come from?"

"It's nothing," Kat replied only too hastily, for she suddenly felt foolish for ever bringing the subject up. "Look, let's just get on with the day, shall we, dear?"

Kat forced a smile on her face, to which Luke responded with a kiss on the cheek and got up to prepare for the day. At least it's a Saturday, Kat thought. She stifled a yawn and stretched, and just as she took a step out of the bed, her foot caught on the sheet, and she stumbled and fell to the carpeted floor.

Kat now found herself reliving a long-forgotten memory, resurfaced from somewhere deep within the recesses of her mind.

She wondered if she should dare to glimpse into his endless black eyes and try to truly see him, but rather, afraid, she merely went through the motions, her comprehension flawed and battered bare. She knew it to be a foolish endeavor to venture deeper into the recesses of his fermented, fragmented mind, it being hopeless at best, at least according to the ways of the world.

She breathed heavily, sighing, ready to simply turn away... but then, wheeling mercilessly around, she plummeted straight into his darkest waters, ever plunging deeper into his soul. In anger, he cursed her, calling her a ruthless bitch, but she smiled, knowing that what she had found was worth more than words can ever say, so she glanced mysteriously toward his form and winked.

He scoffed and muttered, "Damn you, woman," and as his calloused hand found hers, they walked together into the sunset...

But years later, they had each walked their own ways, and Kat now found herself nearly at wit's end for relinquishing any sort of hope for Josh's soul. He was a lost man and a lost cause. The memory faded in the distance, only to be replaced by that horrid grey that had plagued her dreams, and then she thought she heard a voice say, "You'll be okay."

"Luke?" she asked vaguely, trying to discern his form amidst the shadows and formless swirls of matter that clouded her vision.

Then came a very intense, bright light, and she winced as she realized how much her head hurt. She felt Luke's strong hand on her back, gently guiding her into a seated position. Even though she was seeing his worried face now, those now-annoying clouds of grey were still floating mercilessly around in her field of vision. She blinked several times, trying desperately to dispel them, but to no avail. Finally, she gave up and sighed.

"What happened?" Luke asked, clearly concerned and perplexed.

"I- I'm not entirely sure," Kat confessed. "I mean, I- uh, I think I passed out, and my head really hurts."

She brought her hand to her head to try and stifle the pain, but it was beginning to ebb. Kat tried to recall what she had experienced when she had passed out, but now all her mind could remember was the greyness.

"Will you be all right?" Luke questioned, pulling her up. "After what happened in the bathtub yesterday, I've got to admit, Kat, I'm rather worried about you. You've been acting... strange lately."

Now standing up, Kat felt as if the room was moving all around her. She looked at Luke, her expression wary and scared.

"Please help me to the bed," she croaked, trying not to cry.

"Of course, darling."

Luke walked Kat to the bed, where she lay down.

"I'm sorry," she said, frowning. "I admit that I've been feeling a bit off lately, but maybe I'm just sick or something. I think it would be for the best if I just... um, stayed in bed a little while longer. I'm probably just worn out. Don't worry so much, Luke."

"I can't help but to worry, Kat," Luke replied firmly yet softly. "Maybe you do just need some rest, but promise me that you won't try getting out of bed until you've well-rested, all right?"

Kat nodded and turned onto her side, closing her eyes, forcing back the unshed tears. She felt it foolish to cry over something so trivial, for what would her husband think of her if she told him that she was simply having nightmares that were making her so upset? She wasn't a child, after all, so like the adult she thought she was, Kat forced herself back to sleep, but the next time she opened her eyes, it was a child she was looking upon.

"Angela," she whispered.